The experience of getting the feeling life is unfair by your own will is often confusing. The fact that you have desires that strive towards beauty which are making sacrifices is a spoiler. The idea of an avoidant utopia, a term I have derived from thinking about "The Laws" by Plato draws pretty clear the notion of a need for courage into the social world. I see that into the interventions used for people who are experiencing this difficulty by being aware of these tendencies towards certain others are congruent with this idea. What is done is pinpointing to the values of the person within a context of neglect of these problems as a general matter. There is a breaking of emotional contracts to what is general and impersonal. By stressing that the distress is felt by something good is one thing, the connection to be able to live with it another. What typically will be done is making the mindset more progressive. This means that the learning paradigm gets reinforced. Stereotypes and their biases (lets say the content with its evaluation) are formed by the developing culture is here the stance. Important here in is to deal with critique by not thinking in black and white. This process has been associated with splitting into psychoanalytic context. Also the use of scripts returns ever again, because the behavior itself becomes the point where you start out of. The only idea that remains of the avoidant utopia is that we are one. If you want to be a good person you can't have a negative worldview. This will make you feel much more pain and aggression. Still is it so that being avoidant yourself for negative triggers in the context of certain groups works out well.
From this position there are techniques that can make you learn to cope with stereotypes (like thinking in clan or group). There are also techniques to prevent making one in a more adult and as such less radical manner. To cope with means foremost becoming your own psychologist and we do this by psychological knowledge like there are in books or articles. Being aware of thoughts can have an influence on your behavior by a realistic attitude. Again we use the imagination of something good to alternate. Curiosity to see it more this way, with empathy and will for sharing goals, can bring you at least to realistic conduct from a psychological stance within the present. The will to think in concrete examples and to take perspective into this way of mindfulness. To act as an adult at the other side means as a matter of fact to postpone to fairness rather than being vulnerable to critique of others. This debate has to be hold subjective, well deliberative and active towards reality. Without good and honest communication there is no adult communication. Even if, this happens very often into ways of coping with feeling dissonance with coming above and beyond each other.